I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize