I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
