My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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