i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize