Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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