no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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