Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I will pee on everything he values.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize