Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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