Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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