my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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