Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Please, let me fuck your mom
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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