I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
