I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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