I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
