You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize