Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.