Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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