He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
