people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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