thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
