my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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