Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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