i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
