You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
