turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize