who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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