I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
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