Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
nutella sex= disaster
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
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