We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
