he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
