I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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