I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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