Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize