I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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