So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize