dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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