THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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