Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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