Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
