He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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