I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
