i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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