I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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