Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
