I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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