And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
