he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
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Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
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I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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