I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
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I think I have vodka in my lungs
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
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I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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