I look better un-naked...
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
