she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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